I am still puzzled that people’s interpretation of themselves is so inaccurate. It seems that the more I am around new people, the more I am reminded that it is very rare that people view themselves with realistic eyes.
I believe that it is because of this reason that we often fail to get along with one another. If I compliment someone, they think the only reason I’m complimenting them is to be nice. If I criticize someone, they feel that I don’t understand them and therefore clearly I am mistaken in my constructive advice. There is always some level of perception. I will most likely view you differently then the way you view yourself. But when it comes down to it, we don’t try hard enough to view ourselves in a realistic way.
We think, “I’m ugly.” “I’m kind.” “I’m selfless.” “I’m worthless.” Ect.
Usually, the negative qualities we see others the most, are in ourselves. So in other words when you say. “I can’t stand people like ____.” Or “I hate people that ____.”
It is more than likely that you yourself have that problem.
So why do we do it? Why can’t we see ourselves for what we are?
I believe that is for a great many reasons. One being, that it is too painful to accept the selfish qualities we all posses. Sometimes, we have to pretend they are nonexistent, in order to crawl out of bed in the morning. Another being, due to our life circumstances others have convinced us that we are someone other than who we truly are. We start to believe the many great misconceptions that people place on our shoulders.
But I believe the greatest reason, is because we spend almost every moment of our day worrying about others.
“This person did this to me.” “This person said this to me.” “This person did this.” “This person did that.”
Think about it.
We get on myspace everyday and scour through other’s profiles. Making assumptions, assigning titles. It’s inevitable. We all do it. It’s natural. We listen to our friends on the phone and think of the choices they SHOULD be making. Or we point out their qualities and flaws, because that’s easier than focusing on our own. We take other peoples problems on. Not because we are selfless and truly care, but because we WANT to be apart of it. Because deep down we want to be able to say, “When he did that to you, I was so angry.” Even when the situation has NOTHING to do with us! It’s incredible!
The whole irony is how blind we are to our own blindness. Some of you will read this and think, “This isn’t me. I know I’m not like this.” And the fact of the matter is, you are. It’s YOU that refuses to accept the fact that you are naturally selfish. It is YOU that accepts blame not because you really think you did something wrong, but because it will please the person in the conflict with you. It is YOU that thinks the whole world is out to get you. That you have had such a hard life, full of misery, and that no one could possibly understand how you feel or what you’re going through. It is YOU that looks back on your past and thinks, these people should have acted differently. YOU never think, maybe I could have handled it better. Sure, maybe you SAY you think that. But you don’t really. YOU know deep down it was their fault.
I am reading this as I write it. So I apply under the YOU category.
And hey, there are truly selfless people out there, but it’s those people that will read this and think. Yeah… this is me.
It’s YOU that will read this and think…
I have nothing to change.
